Full Circle

Dear Indie Girl,

Listen ->Coming Home– written and recorded by Kelsey Rottiers in 2007

It’s funny how life comes full circle.

Tonight I was thinking about this song I wrote in 2007 after a much needed break up.  I was still convinced we were going to get back together.  I was sure running back to this relationship would be like going home.  Well, it wasn’t.  But because of this break up, I did end up moving home to rebuild some relationships I had really hurt in the process.  I remember standing in the kitchen with my parents and telling them in between sobs how I felt like I had failed them because I’d let this relationship dominate me in the worst way, because I wasn’t as strong as they had raised me to be, and ultimately because I had given in to a counterfeit love.

They both, with tears in their eyes, assured me that they had never seen me as a failure, but only saw how strong I was for finally turning away.  And reminded me that I got out of the situation when I saw that it was not right for me.

Listen-> Home– written and recorded by Kelsey Rottiers- Pray in 2014 (seven years later)

Last week I expressed some pretty heavy ideas I’ve had about where we’ve been playing and some new directions we’re taking.  I wrote this song after realizing that I didn’t feel like my music had a home, and I was scared that it had no audience that would truly receive it.

And after revealing my intention to seek out gigs at churches (and venues more like a listening room) I repeated this refrain, “it’s time to go home.”

I’m choosing to play at venues better suited for a listening environment for the same reasons that I chose to move home and reconcile with my parents.  I’m choosing to say “no” to venues not suited for a listening environment for the same reason that I walked away from that relationship that was hurting me.  He wasn’t an evil person.  He wasn’t even a bad guy.  In one of our last conversation I told him how much I respected him and liked him as a person, but that I just didn’t think we were fit for each other.

As we round this corner into a new season, I’m humbled to continue serving you in music.  I hope you keep listening.

It’s funny how life comes full circle.